Okay families, if you read last week’s post about delaying the transition and have exhausted every effort to contain your miniature escape artist but they are still hopping out of the crib, then this blog is for you! Welcome! I am glad you are here!

Isn’t it a little wild to even be considering making the change to a big kid bed? I recall how they went from looking like babies to seeming so old all of a sudden, seeing them there in their beds.

I remember the switch for each of our three sons. Our oldest stayed in his crib like an angel until he was almost three. He has always been a rule follower and I’m pretty sure it didn’t even occur to him that he was allowed to leave his crib. Our middle started clambering out probably before he was even 18-months old; he is still our most athletic, strong kid. The “baby” climbed out around 20-months and, I’ll be honest, I didn’t really try to keep him in. I was just excited to move him in with his big brothers to free up my guest room.

It was a low-key nightmare, so, do as I say, not as I do, and delay if you can.

When the time comes and your hand is forced, follow these tips to make the change as smooth as possible.

1) Toddler-proof the entire room

Essentially you need to turn the entire room into a crib. Mount furniture to the walls, secure the cords to window blinds or have child-proof blinds installed. Cover all exposed outlets. Take most toys out of the room if they will be too stimulating for your child. Make sure the floor is clear of clutter at bedtime so they are less likely to trip. Secure the door with a child-proof handle cover or a baby gate***

2) Be patient while they adjust

If you used to be able to put your baby in the crib and walk out, but they don’t want to stay put in their big kid bed, be patient but consistent. Sit with them until they fall asleep for a few nights, return them to their bed and tuck them back in, try not to raise your voice, and recognize that their newfound freedom is a big, exciting change! That said, it is perfectly okay to draw a firm boundary that they need to sleep in their own bed at night if you believe it is what is best for the whole family.

3) Get them a new stuffed animal, special lovey, or one of your worn shirts to sleep with for extra comfort

You want your child to feel safe, comfortable, and secure in their big kid bed. Sometimes all it takes is a transitional object to hold to remind them that they can confidently sleep there all night.

Our own kids were excited to have mommy’s very own hand-me-down stuffy to take to bed. My old teddy bear from my childhood gets passed around between kids every few nights and permanently lives in the boys’ room. If it helps them feel safe and comforted, then I am happy to let him go.

4) Consider using an OK to Wake clock

Your child doesn’t need to be able to label colors to know that the clock has changed to their “OK to Wake” color. If they struggle with early mornings after transitioning, get them a clock, explain that when the color changes/sun comes up/alarm goes off that it is time to start the day. If it hasn’t changed, they should stay in bed and go back to sleep. While they are getting the hang of it, reward them every morning they are successful with praise and maybe even a small breakfast treat. Give the reward immediately upon going into their room to start the day so they learn to associate the color change with the reward.

5) Know when to use tough love

Professionally, I have never suggested a parent just shut the door and walk away for the entire night. Ever.

That said….

The middle of the night is just no time to negotiate with a toddler. They are exhausted, irrational, and prepared to engage in and epic battle if you let them.

A power struggle at 2am is, quite literally, a nightmare. The middle of the night is the one time when I truly, honestly recommend you plop your darling toddler back in bed with all the necessary blankets and loveys, give a kiss, and leave. Do not talk, do not negotiate, do not bribe, do not create new sleep props you aren’t willing to continue (like climbing in their bed with them!).

Put them back in bed, tuck them in, give a kiss and an “I love you, time for sleep!” and walk away. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

Taking the power struggle out of it usually makes this a quick thing. After a night or two they are able to roll over and go back to sleep rather than try to start a household war in the wee hours.

 If your newly big kid continues to make bedtime a struggle, stay tuned for my Toddler Sleep e-book on its way soon by signing up for my newsletter below, or we can hop on a call and get sleep back on track right away. Schedule a call here and get the ball rolling!

***I know some parents balk at the idea of locking their toddler in their room. First, you had them “locked” in a crib not so long ago. Second, there are several risks to your child being able to freely leave. Of course the rest of your home may not be as safely child-proofed, but more importantly, their room is the safest place to be in the event of a house fire. Toddlers are not responsible enough to check for a hot door handle or check for smoke. The risk of smoke inhalation from exiting their room is great. They should wait to be helped to safety. So in addition to them not wandering the house at night or coming to get you, they are kept safe from bigger dangers. Have a baby monitor up if you need them to be able to call for you easily.